1st non-Ricky post.

Well here I am in sunny Arizona. We don't have island dogs, but we do have wild desert pigs. They are called javelinas and are delicious.

Cat doesn't have a job. I thought she was Asian when I married her.

Cat has gotten so lazy she has Maria (our illegally emigrated live-in help) operate the remote for her. Maria always turns on Univision, and pretends not to understand Cat when she yells for Maria to change the channel. "CAMBIO MARIA, CAM-BEE-OH." Maria is a real character.

I have been using a lot of jokes with my Army buddies that start with the line "so there I was, balls deep in..." the punchline is usually something like "an Asian prostitute's ass, thinking to myself 'how much is this going to cost me?'"

Cat and I have been double dating a lot as of late. We hang out with an Asian couple (the man is Laotian and the woman is Chinese). Man, I stick out like a sore thumb. We go to restaurants and the host will think it is a party of 3. It is really annoying, and really true.

The best part about being the only white guy with a group of Asians is that I don't have to prove anything. Everyone knows who is... well... you know... not driving a Civic.

Me and Wu Tang Clan went out this past weekend in Tuscon. Guess what we had for dinner... ASIAN! Anyway, 9 Sapporos later, I was telling everyone I was "Daniel-son," yelling about karate chops and leg sweeps and bonsai plants. Good times.

I wish I had more to say. Basically I am working for the weekend. But isn't everyone? Probably not Josh Sanders, I doubt he has a job. I wonder how his eyebrows look now.

I will be moving East in July to the Baltimore, MD area. I am going to be Ray Lewis' training partner. Beat that Pete.